Jump to content


Photo

Tell the Best Joke


  • Please log in to reply
16 replies to this topic

#1 StreetPassWanter

StreetPassWanter

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,517 posts

Posted 14 January 2012 - 07:05 PM

The rules are simple: Tell a joke not mentioned in this thread. Then, click the "like this" button when you find a joke you really like. Whoever has the most likes wins! Oh, and this is an ongoing thing! :D

My Joke:

I used to rule at Zelda, but then I took a Light Arrow to the knee.


(PS: You can steal from the interwebz! Although it'd be better if you didn't)
Posted Image

^CLICK RIGHT NOW TO FACE PURE AWESOMENESS (MAYBE)
@SSB4News <- Pure awesomeness is now on Twitter!

#2 Tipzil

Tipzil

    Bob-omb

  • Members
  • 262 posts
  • Fandom:
    Link, Pokemon, Nintendo, Minecraft

Posted 14 January 2012 - 07:34 PM

I made this up:

#1: What did the Ocean say to the sea?
#2: What?
#1: Nothing It Just Waved
#2: oh
#1: Do you Sea What I did there?
#2: No
#1: I'm Shore You Did
#2: How do you have friends?
#1: Don't be such a Beach!
"I wombo, you wombo, he, she, me wombo, the study of womboligy, come on Spongebob, this is first grade!" ~ Patrick, Spongebob Squarepants

"Nah Nah Nah Man, you see, mah name is An'twan!" ~ Josh, Drake & Josh

#3 Xiombarg

Xiombarg

    [Sample Text]

  • Administrators
  • 1,816 posts

Posted 14 January 2012 - 07:59 PM

What do you do when an elephant comes in your window?
Spoiler


#4 StreetPassWanter

StreetPassWanter

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,517 posts

Posted 14 January 2012 - 08:20 PM

Two men walk into a bar.

Man 1: Can I have some H20?
Man 2: I'll have some H20, too!

The second man died the next day.
Posted Image

^CLICK RIGHT NOW TO FACE PURE AWESOMENESS (MAYBE)
@SSB4News <- Pure awesomeness is now on Twitter!

#5 Tipzil

Tipzil

    Bob-omb

  • Members
  • 262 posts
  • Fandom:
    Link, Pokemon, Nintendo, Minecraft

Posted 14 January 2012 - 09:14 PM

A Man walks into a Bar
Spoiler


Here's another one
Guy1- Look!
Guy2-What?
Guy1-A Magical Slide!
Guy1-I'll go first!
(whatever they say, that's what they'll land in)
Guy1- MONEY!
*Lands In Money*
Guy2- ALCOHOL!
*Lands In Alcohol*
Guy3- *Trips Over* "Sh!T!!!

Guess what he lands in XD
"I wombo, you wombo, he, she, me wombo, the study of womboligy, come on Spongebob, this is first grade!" ~ Patrick, Spongebob Squarepants

"Nah Nah Nah Man, you see, mah name is An'twan!" ~ Josh, Drake & Josh

#6 ThePumpkinKing

ThePumpkinKing

    Cheep-Cheep

  • Members
  • 142 posts
  • Fandom:
    Spider-Man, Professor Layton

Posted 14 January 2012 - 09:22 PM

How do you bother Lady Gaga?

POKER FACE!
Recently Watched Movies: The Dark Knight Rises, The Amazing Spider-Man (Favorite of this year), The Avengers.

Current Games I'm Playing: Professor Layton and the Miracle Mask, Okami HD, LittleBigPlanet

What I'm Geeking Out For This Month: The Amazing Spider-Man DVD Release, and of course, The WiiU

#7 Auzzie Wingman

Auzzie Wingman

    Mournblade

  • Members
  • 4,346 posts
  • NNID:AuzzieWingman
  • Fandom:
    Not enough space here

Posted 14 January 2012 - 10:59 PM

A priest walks into a bar, after a hard day... probably mopping the floor between the pews, and asks for an apple cider.

Next to him, a loud, disorderly drunkard tries to make a deal with the bartender to give him another drink, but to no avail.

"Look, you've had one too many" said the Bartender.
"Naosh, vluk sheer mishtah!..." said the drunk, trailing off into mumbling stutter.

The bartender asks the priest to take the drunk man to his house. He gives him the address, and walks off to the kitchen.

The priest attempts to talk him into getting up, but he's too intoxicated for anything to get through at this point, so the priest grabs him off the stool. Unfortunately, the man falls to the ground.

The priest attempts to get the man off the ground several times, and after some trial and error, is able to drag him to the car. The priest takes the drunk man to the place written down on a piece of paper.

When they arrive, the priest hauled out the drunk man, but he's still too intoxicated to walk on his own two feet.
After climbing up a steep driveway, a woman opens it.

"Oh my, did you bring him all the way here from the pub?..."

She gives a puzzling look to the priest.

"What is it?" gasped the priest, still trying to catch his breath.

"Uhm, you didn't drag him all the way here, did you?"

"Yeah, I did, and I tell you, I have never seen a man so off his tit that he couldn't move his legs."

Spoiler

Trophy Cards are classy too! LOLZIGZAGOON

 

AuzzieWingman.png


#8 Hinkik

Hinkik

    Skrillax numbr 1 faen

  • Members
  • 667 posts
  • Fandom:
    Skrallux

Posted 15 January 2012 - 08:06 AM

This is a strange swedish joke :D

Once upon a time there was two elks that was flying. Then the first elk said Hey but we can't fly or talk. Then the other one said I doesn't matter cause my grandma has a toaster.

28gxdv8.png


#9 StreetPassWanter

StreetPassWanter

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,517 posts

Posted 15 January 2012 - 08:09 AM

Bob, a sixth grader, walked into his dad's study while his dad was working on the computer.

"Dad," said Bob, "Remember when you told me you'd give me thirty dollars if I passed my science test?"

Dad nodded.

Spoiler

Edited by StreetPassWanter, 15 January 2012 - 08:10 AM.

Posted Image

^CLICK RIGHT NOW TO FACE PURE AWESOMENESS (MAYBE)
@SSB4News <- Pure awesomeness is now on Twitter!

#10 HaoSenVastForest

HaoSenVastForest

    Chain Chomp

  • Members
  • 686 posts
  • Fandom:
    Everything LoZ!!!

Posted 15 January 2012 - 08:44 AM

Okay Chinese joke:

There was a boat sailing when all of a sudden a god comes down and asks for a man. They all thought that the man did something wrong so they just threw the dude at the god as he took him away.

Well it turns out that the god was saving the man and the crew hit a rock and sank.

Posted Image

In a world of Gray and black there is nothing here to take back...

(Words from your local demon and leader of the army of darkness)


#11 StreetPassWanter

StreetPassWanter

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,517 posts

Posted 15 January 2012 - 10:39 AM

Posted Image
Posted Image

^CLICK RIGHT NOW TO FACE PURE AWESOMENESS (MAYBE)
@SSB4News <- Pure awesomeness is now on Twitter!

#12 WisdomPowerCourage

WisdomPowerCourage

    ZEWOP BOOPITY BOP!

  • Members
  • 615 posts
  • Fandom:
    Cats Pajamas.

Posted 27 January 2012 - 06:41 PM

So a magician's walking down the street, then he turns into a grocery store.

#13 Waller

Waller

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,655 posts
  • Fandom:
    Nothing

Posted 30 January 2012 - 06:31 PM

So a magician's walking down the street, then he turns into a grocery store.


Posted Image

ezgif_com_gif_maker.gif


#14 Xiombarg

Xiombarg

    [Sample Text]

  • Administrators
  • 1,816 posts

Posted 30 January 2012 - 07:28 PM

Posted Image

At first, I was going to like your post, but then I realized it was from 9gag.

#15 Auzzie Wingman

Auzzie Wingman

    Mournblade

  • Members
  • 4,346 posts
  • NNID:AuzzieWingman
  • Fandom:
    Not enough space here

Posted 30 January 2012 - 07:49 PM

Seems like everything is coming from 9Gag nowadays.

Remember the good old days when people used to use Funnyjunk because it had tolerable navigation?

Trophy Cards are classy too! LOLZIGZAGOON

 

AuzzieWingman.png


#16 Bill Cipher

Bill Cipher

    IT WAS ME BARRY!

  • Members
  • 1,086 posts
  • NNID:LordOfGrapeJuice
  • Fandom:
    RPGs

Posted 30 January 2012 - 07:54 PM

Terrible joke. This will make you groan, but I'll redeem it later

What did Watson say to Sherlock when they were impersonating gangesters?


WASSUP HOLMIE


Okay, time for a great joke.

A man is the Zelda Franchise's biggest fan. Let's call him Andy. He spends all his money buying every game in the series and then sets out to create a perfect timeline after playing every game and taking notes. However, upon submitting it to Nintendo, he realizes that he forgot Twilight Princess from the timeline. When Nintendo sends it back, they write a note reading:
Spoiler

Edited by Domini N Unova, 30 January 2012 - 07:55 PM.

Games that refuse to use Gameplay effectively to do anything are like films that refuse to use cinematography in film to do anything.

NNID: Lord of Grape Juice /PSN: Nderbert/Steam: Harmonius EX

Games/Animation/Film/Comics/Literature/Fantasy/Sci-fi.

 


#17 Waller

Waller

    Hammer Bro.

  • Members
  • 1,655 posts
  • Fandom:
    Nothing

Posted 30 January 2012 - 09:05 PM

At first, I was going to like your post, but then I realized it was from 9gag.


Looks like it still got your like, though.

ezgif_com_gif_maker.gif





1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

Anti-Spam Bots!